Lu
First of all, you have to be sure you have a problem with milk only or could it be a combination problem? Have you been tested or have you done the exercise called "elimination"? I don't believe there is a cure for 'milk allergy' or 'Lactose Intolerance'... You just have to get used to avoiding milk and all of its by-products. You lack the enzyme that makes you tolerant of the milk sugar. I have "enjoyed" this problem for 26 years and was in fighting form along the way, but I finally gave in to the losing battle I waged. I have discovered, though, that I can tolerate very small quantities of hard cheese (Parmesan, Suisse) and Yogurt. I just don't use them too often (like once a day) -- maybe once a week or every other week -- two tablespoonfuls of parmesan sprinkled over a pasta dish. I have found that tablets of Lactaid before the first bite containing milk do help the cramping pains that visit within about a half hour of consumption, but this measure is a snare and a delusion for me -- the problem is only delayed by these pills and within about 24 hours the big reaction strikes without warning. Just avoiding milk and all its by-products is the easiest remedy by far. After you adjust to it, life gets really simple -- don't fight it. You absolutely must become a label reader to avoid all the hidden snares of trying to avoid milk completely. There are so many good things 'out there'to take its place. Its a matter of educating yourself; make a few resolutions and stick religiously to them. Soon you won't miss the milk -- I missed it terribly at first but kept studying and looking for substitutes or a new way of getting the same nutrients that milk provides. Sit down and have a talk with someone who has been there and done that. You will be surprised to learn that you are not alone and every story is different and offers new ideas for you. And when you eat out make sure you let the waiter know you don't want anything with milk or it's relatives in it (this can be a bit tricky, though). I am getting used to not eating out. You will find whole/fresh/raw/make your own from scratch to be an easy and healthful way. Water is most often a good substitute for milk in baking. The sky is the limit, so be adventuresome; it can be great fun. Good luck. Be happy that you are blessed with only one avoidable problem.