hi joy! i know it has been a while since you posted...hope you get this anyway. joy, life is so very hard, isn't it? i was so glad to hear your mention of our Lord, though, because HE DOES have it all in control. everyday is a gift - i find this quote very soothing when things get overwhelming : "the same everlasting Father who cares for you today will take care of you (and your dear daughter) tomorrow and every day. Either He will shield you from suffering, or He will give you the strength to bear it. Be at peace, then, and put aside all anxious thoughts and imaginations." God Bless You!!