B.
In 1992 my daughter was hit by a car and suffered a TBI. She was 12 years old and went from an honor roll student to special education after months of rehab. The neurologists and neurolosurgeons told us she would never recover 100%. Instead of wondering what she would have been like we, with our daughter, started discovering her new normal. Foods she loved prior to the accident she now hated. She would become violent, often trying to kill me or another in our family. She had grand mal seizures and petit mal seizures. The doctors put her on every medication imagineable. The one medication I balked at was the Lithium at the age of 14. It was only a short time and she was taken off it. She was put on Zoloft and it was a remarkable medication! She was able to stop all other meds except the Tegretol and Zoloft. She is now 21 years old. The specialists said she may never graduate high school even in special ed. She did! She attempted some school post high school, but it was too much. She is working full time and loves it. She still has minimal short term memory, no long term and little if any mid term, but with all her cognitive retraining, biofeedback, etc. she has found her new normal and is thriving! We have to pay her bills for her and manage her money, but she is happy. People kept asking if I've grieved the loss of my daughter. At first I thought that was a cold, cruel comment...I know understand what they meant. Our daughter as we knew her was gone. OUr daughter whom we love unconditionally was always right there with us. Regardless of her "limitations" we love her. It took a few years for her to accept her memory problems. Her boss gave her an unlimited budget for post - it notes. We tried the laptop computer, biofeedback, organizational binders for school...all she needed was to find what worked for her..post-it notes. There have been several bathtub floods in our house...I have mops. A few near fires with the stove...we put a quick and abrupt halt to any cooking unless someone else as home. Again, post it notes told her not to cook. She carried a little notebook around with necessary phone numbers (home, my work, etc.), her address, and basic information. She was able to get her driver's license and saved enough money up to buy a car. She may never be like she would have been pre-accident, but I am so proud of her strength and determination. I cann't imagine her any other way but the way she is...our gift. She still lives at home and may live her forever...who knows. Herdoctors all told us they know so little about the brain, but assured us she would never be able to drive or hold down a job. She still loves proving them wrong and takes it on as a challenge. We never once told her she couldn't do something. We encouraged her to try anything...we'd be there to catch her if she fell, but more often than not she was able to grab that star.