Lisa
I know how you feel. I resisted going back on prescription meds as they made me feel "momtone" but I was starting to have suicidal thoughts and I was raging at my family all the time so for the sake of my kids, I went back into therapy (I found a good bio-energetic therapist which is a type of therapy that seems to work well for depression), and asked my med. Dr. for anti-depressants. He put me on high doses of "pharmicutical" grade Saint Johns Wort and I have been doing great! Don;t just buy some over the counter though - go see a Dr. who practices natural medicine and ask him/her for Standard Process supliments. Alos cutting caffine from my diet helped greatly - beleive it or not! Good luck.